"Think I'll Drop My Anchor In That harbour Over There..."

The Players all have their own defining characteristics.

There's The Overthinker, The Quiet One, The Shrew, The Show Off, The Hypochondriac and, of course, The Lothario.

The latter, at first, was fairly insignificant to be honest. He flew under the radar because well, we didn't talk. Shame really.

We'd overhear excerpts of his shenannigans. Anecdotes that would include themes such as:

Drinking

Sex

Films

if not a combination of all of the above.

Now though,

It's a whole different story.

The Tutor [henceforth possibly referred to as The Dick or The Twat or The C*nt - more of whom later] had low expectations. He has his favourites and really that will never change and thats how he grades work along with his prejudiced first impressions. Needless to say, him and The Lothario do not get along.

The Dick reckons L is a timewaster, who only chose Theatre Studies as a doss and although he may not be completely inaccurate, over the past six months he continually failed to give L the credit he deserved.

The two have a bizarre relationship.

From the outside, you'd mistake them for quarelling lovers.

Well . . . on The Dick's part anyway.

Their banter is a rapid exchange of dirty, derogatory, ego stroking metaphors and insults and is really quite something to behold.

The Lothario for example, can turn any innocent phrase into a dirty joke or penis reference 'cos that's simply how his mind works. The result of his sordid brain can be seen in his childish guffaws and outbursts that are frequent occurences and often highlights in the Twat's lessons.

The day I knew the kid was alright, was after this little gem:

Tutor: You will never get anywhere in life acting like that!"

Lothario: I beg to differ."

Tutor: Do enlighten me."

Lothario: I have a massive penis. It's gonna get me a helluva lot further than an A-

Level in Drama."

He swung his satchel over his shoulder and strode out of the theatre.

And let me tell you, judging from his gait, he wasn't lying.